Hes in for it now
by Twilight Star
Summary: My first Gundam fic.Please R &R!!!!Basically bad humor,a very pissed Wufei and a drunk Duo.All brought to you by my messed up brain.
1. Default Chapter Title

  
Heyyyy!!!This is my first Gundam fic so please be kind.Reviews,flames,death threats and info on secret military operations are welcome!  
  
  
Disclaimer:No I don't own Gundam Wing though I wish I did.It's owned by Bandai and some other people and they also own the characters except Duo Maxwell.*I* own him. ^_^(I wish!!).A bit of subtle shounen ai 3x4(sorry all you non shounen ai fans!) some Relena bashing( again sorry all you Relena fans but I just cant stand her :P) and BAD HUMOR brought to you by yours truly.If youre still reading,enjoy and please review!!!  
  
  
{ }These are for the characters thoughts  
^ ^ These are for my opinions  
  
  
  
He's in for it now by Dou's Girl  
  
  
  
Duo was lying on the couch in the living room flipping through the channels with the remote,looking very bored.Heero was sitting on the kitchen table doing something on his laptop.Trowa and Quatre were in Trowa's room enjoying each others "company" and Wufei was in his room,where he'd been all day.Duo got up from the couch.  
  
  
"Man I am sooo bored."he said as he walked around the room.He saw the object of his affection working on something so he walked up to him and put his arms around him."Hey He-chan,whatcha doing?"said the braided pilot.  
  
  
"....nothing...." he said,looking at the screen with a look of concentration on his face."Now go away Duo.Im trying to do something here."  
  
  
Duo pouted and let go of Heero."Hmph...I'm going to the kitchen.Im sure the fridge will treat me better than you."he said as he went into the kitchen.Heero looked up from his laptop and to the kitchen,let out a small(and I mean tiny)smile and looked back at the screen."Kuso!! I lost at solitaire AGAIN!!!"  
  
  
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"There has to be something to eat in here."said the braided pilot as he rummaged through the fridge.He put his hands on his hips and looked around.He saw a bottle of vodka sitting on the counter and got an evil grin on his (gorgeous)face.  
  
  
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"AAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!MAXWELLL!!!!!!!!"screamed an enraged Wufei as he stormed out of his room holding a set of pictures in his right hand."Maxwell,you'll pay for this!"  
  
  
Trowa and Quatre ran into the room,Quatre with his shirt on backwards and Trowa wearing only boxers."Whats wrong,Wufei?"said the Sandrock pilot with concern.Wufei just stared at them for a second and a little bit of blood came out of his nose. "What?...Oh right..injustice!!Maxwell must pay for this injustice!"he angrily handed Quatre the pictures and began looking frantically around the room for Duo.  
  
  
Quatre blushed."Oh my...Are you sure Duo took these?" "Of course!That guy is a total hentai."he said as he opened the closet door.Trowa took one of the pictures from Quatre's hand and looked at it with curiosity."I had no idea you were that flexible,Wufei."he said at the pissed Chinese pilot only to get the patented Wufei Chang glare of justice (r). Trowa silently squeaked as Wufei continued his search for the Shinigami pilot.  
  
  
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Duo was now finishing his 9th shot of vodka.He had a very relaxed look on his face and was trying to pour himself another glass without spilling it when he hears that annoying voice calling the name of his koi."Heeeerrroooo" "Oh no,nots that bitch again.."he said as Relena came waltzing through the kitchen door. "Hi Duo.Have you seen Heero anywhere?"she said in her usually annoying voice."Hn.Hes probably some place trying to hide from you,stalker bitch." ^Amazing.9 shots of vodka and he doesn't even slur.How DOES he do it?^  
  
  
Relena's eyes teared up "I am not a stalker.I know that Heero loves me.Why else would he want to kill me?"she said as she looked sternly at Duo,only inches away from his face."Oh I don't know.Probably because he hates you?"said the Deathscythe Hell pilot with a drunken grin on his face.{Oh no.Here it comes...}he thought to himself just as the most annoying and scary sound on the face of the planet...no,universe,was heard. "WAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!"  
  
  
  
To be continued.....  
  
  
  
Dou's Girl:Yay!That was my first fic!Did you like it or hate it?  
  
Wufei:Hn.I hated it.  
  
Dou's Girl:Aw,glad you liked it Wuffy!  
  
Wufei:Its WuFEI!!!WuFEI,onna!!This is dishon -(stuffs Duo braid in his mouth)  
  
Duo just sits there helpless while Duo's girl clings tightly to his arm.  
  
Duo:This is so not cool.  
  
Dou's Girl:Ah,much better.~evil grin~Looks like you'll have to wait until part 2 to see what happens and why WuFEI,there I said it right, is so pissed about those pictures and if you've figured out what they're about already,don't say it!!!Ja ne!  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	2. He's in for it now 2

This is my second humor fic * ducks flying objects and hears various creams * * sweatdrop *.I warn you,it isn't that funny.Ok,maybe it is to some.You decide.Reviews,flames and death threats welcome!!!

Disclaimer:I do not own Gundam Wing or any of the characters except Duo Maxwell.(I wish!)This ficcy contains bad humor,mild shounen ai,Relena bashing,a drunk Duo and a very pissed off Wufei.If you're easily offended,I suggest you don't read it.Enjoy and please review!!!

He's in for it now part 2

"WAAHHHHH!!!HEERROOOOOO!!!!"was heard throughout the Winner mansion as Relena

came running out of the kitchen bawling like a baby.Heero,still glued to the wonder that is the pc version of solitaire said in his usual emotionless voice "Relena." "Oh Heeerooo!!!" cried Relena as she glomped onto Spandex boy.Heero only let out a small grunt and kept playing.

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Wufei was looking around the hangar,where all their gundams were,ashe searched for Duo. "When I catch that baka Maxwell,I'm going to..."the rest was incomprehensible except for a few cries of 'Injustice' and 'The kitchen!'.He exited the hangar,oblivious to Nataku's appearance(a/n:You'll find out soon!Bwaaahahahahahaha! *reader sweatdrops * Um...)

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Quatre and Trowa laid on Trowa's bed,listening to Relena's cries outside. "I wonder whats wrong with Miss Relena." He said worriedly. "......." "You're right,Trowa.I shouldn't worry about it."he said as he kissed Trowa lightly on the lips.Trowa took the blonde pilot into his arms and ruffled his hair a bit. "I love you,little one."(a/n:Isn't this just soooo cute??? ^_^)

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Duo was now finishing his 12th shot of vodka.He got up,by miracle,and wobbled across the kitchen and into the living room,where a teary eyed Relena was still glomped onto a * very * annoyed Heero.You can tell he's annoyed because his right eye is twitching like Dorothy's eyebrows.He slowly made his way through the living room and plopped down on the couch.He saw Wufei's recently polished sword lying next to him.He picked it up and started playing around with it.

"Heero?"

"Hn?"

"You love me,don't you?"Heero took his blue eyes away from his laptop and looked at Relena. "...no..." "You shooouldns hasve sais szat..." slurred Duo as Relena teared up once again. "WAAAHHHH!!!Hee-chan doesn't love me.Duo was riiiiighhttttt!!!"she cried.Heero just rolled his eyes as Duo walked up to Relena,sword in hand. "Well,DUH!!!Sssshinigami issss* hic * always * hic * rsights."Relena stuck her tongue out at Duo. "Heero does love me.He just doesn't want to admit it."A few groans were heard.Then Duo got an idea.

"Hey guyysss....wsho am I?"he said as he swung the sword wildly. "Tshiss iss insjussstishhe!!I shssall avenssge syou, my dear Nataku!!!"

The room suddenly burst into a fit of laughter as a no longer crying Relena (a/n:Thank god!) rolled around the floor laughing her ass off.Even Heero was laughing.Trowa and Quatre,hearing the laughter,ran into the room,seeing Relena and Heero rolling around laughing and Duo wobbling around the room screaming 'Injustice' and 'Weaklings'.No one even realized that they were naked.(a/n: * drool *)"Stupid weaklings!!!Weak onnas!! Oh,Nataku I am not worthy.You deserve a better * lover *!!! (a/n:Ok,I know Wufei has never said this but how can we be sure?lol)Trowa and Quatre couldn't hold back the laughter and they too ended up on the floor laughing.Then it happened........

"MAAAAAAXXXXXXWWWWEEEEELLLLLL!!!!!!!!!"screamed a furious Wufei.An eerie silence filled the room.Everyone looked with shocked at Wufei,who was completely red with anger.Duo,being drunk,didn't seem that concerned that Wufei was about to kill him."Hey Wu man!!Hows it going?Hey,whadda ya have in your han....uh-oh..* giggles nervously *....um..."it suddenly hit him what he was holding."DDDDDDIIIIEEEEEE!!!!!" Wufei lunged at drunk deathscythe pilot,sending him to the ground and started strangling him. "Wu-man,calm down.It was just a practical joke!!!" "I'm going to cut that damn braid of yours and choke you with it!!!!" he said as he continued to strangle Duo,who was now turning red."Guys!!Heero,Quatre..some help here!!!"said Shinigami,trying desperately to break free from Justice boy's grasp. 

"Wufei,stop!!!We shouldn't be fighting at all!!!"cried Quatre.

"Oh,shove it,Winner!"said a very pissed Wufei.

Quatre teared up."Oh,my.......WAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!Trowa!!!!!!!"he cried as he buried himself into Trowa's bare chest.Trowa hugged the sandrock pilot and tried to comfort him.

"Barton,shut up that weakling...and put some damn clothes on!!!!"Wufei screamed as a little blood came down from his nose.Trowa went with Quatre into his room and shut the door. "Wufei,stop wasting your time with Duo.He isn't worth it."said Heero,now back to his usual antisocial self. "I'm not worth it,Hee-chan?"whimpered a now blue-faced Duo.He gave Heero his irresistible Duo Maxwell puppy-dog look ®. "….hn…".Heero sighed and went over and got Wufei off of him."You're a weakling,Yuy!Being ordered around by your weak onna!"

"Hey!!!At least I'm not the one whose gundam is..."

"Whose gundam is what?"said Relena as she got up from the 

floor."Um...nothing!Nothing!!Scratch that last part" said a now nervous Duo. 

"Maxwell,what have you done to Nataku???"said Wufei as he held up his sword to Duo's neck. "Um...it was part of the joke?Hee hee?"giggled Duo nervously as Wufei ran out of the room to the hangar.Heero helped Duo up and looked at the pictures that Wufei dropped.It showed him and Sally in um....a whole different way,to say the least.Heero's eyes widened a little. "Whoa,I've never seen him and Sally like * that * before." "Oooh,Let me see!Let me see!" said Relena,taking one of the pictures."Whoa..."she said before passing out.

Duo looked at one of the explicit pictures. "Hey Heero,do you think WE could try some of these?"he said winking.

"Hn."

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Wufei ran into the hangar and looked up at Nataku. "No...Nataku.." he said softly as he looked up at his beloved gundam.It was painted completely in pink,with roses all over and with the words 'Shinigami Forever'.He fell to his knees crying. 

"No....NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

The end…....or is it?


End file.
